Chapter 9: Problem 3

What is the difference between criticizing a child's undesirable behaviors (which Rogers considers acceptable), and using conditional positive regard (which is harmful)? Illustrate with an example.

Short Answer

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The difference between criticizing a child's behaviors and using conditional positive regard lies in their impact. Criticizing behaviors can encourage better habits by highlighting unwanted behaviors without making the child's worth contingent on them. Conversely, conditional positive regard can harm a child's self-esteem as it makes their sense of their own value dependent on fulfilling certain conditions or behaviors. For example, showing disappointment when a child doesn't do their homework (criticizing behaviors) can be productive learning, but withholding affection until the homework is done (conditional positive regard) may make the child feel their worth is tied to their performance.

Step by step solution

Understand the Concepts

Firstly, the two psychological concepts need to be understood. Criticizing a child's undesirable behaviors refers to the practice of expressing disapproval or pointing out the faults in the child's unwanted behaviors. On the other hand, using conditional positive regard refers to the practice of showing love, praise or approval that is directly dependent on a child performing or behaving in a certain way desired by the parent or caregiver. Carl Rogers mentioned that while the former can be acceptable and even beneficial, the latter could be harmful as it can affect a child's sense of self-worth.

Pinpoint the Differences

The main difference comes from the consequences each practice can have on a child. Criticizing a child's behavior allows the child to understand that the behavior is unacceptable and needs to change, without affecting his/her intrinsic value as a person. However, using conditional positive regard can make a child feel that he/she is only loved when he/she behaves a certain way or accomplishes certain tasks, which can be harmful to the child's sense of self-worth and lead to psychological problems.

Illustrate with Example

For instance, if a child fails to do their homework and their parent shows disappointment, this could be viewed as criticizing the behavior. The child can learn from this and aim to complete their homework next time. However, if the parent withdraws their affection until their child completes the homework, this is conditional positive regard. The child may feel that they are only deserving of love and affection when they have completed their work, which can lead to feelings of unworthiness if they fail.

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What is the difference between criticizing a child's undesirable behaviors (which Rogers considers acceptable), and using conditional positive regard (which is harmful)? Illustrate with an example.

Short Answer

Step by step solution

Understand the Concepts

Pinpoint the Differences

Illustrate with Example

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